Josh and I were divided about when to tell our friends and family about the baby. He wanted to wait until the socially accepted 12-week mark, when the likelihood of miscarriage is reduced. I struggle with anxiety, so I more than understood that precaution. When to tell is a personal decision each family must decide… Continue reading Validating early motherhood
Tag: grief
What Mary offers grieving mothers
For most of my Christian life, Holy Week and Good Friday have been emotionally difficult. It’s a season that brings up old memories of being called a “Christ killer” by the mother of a childhood friend. Hearing Gospel passages of the Jewish people demanding Christ’s death has always made me extremely uncomfortable. That’s still the… Continue reading What Mary offers grieving mothers
Grief is the currency of love
There are a few clubs I’ve been forced to join against my will: The fatherless daughters club. The sexual assault survivors club. And now, the miscarriage club. *** When my depression and trauma were at their worst, I actually felt angry with my parents for trying so hard to have me. I’m the fourth child… Continue reading Grief is the currency of love
I had a daughter
Josh was far more optimistic than I was about trying for a baby. Doctors had told me a while ago that, due to prior health issues, the odds of conceiving were not in my favor. I went into this next venture fully convinced it would never happen. Imagine the depth of my shock and joy… Continue reading I had a daughter
He stood at the gallows and had the last laugh
Excerpted from my essay collection, Things You Can’t Un-see For as long as I can remember, every morning my father made my mother coffee. Contrary to stereotype, my mother was completely inept with everything in the kitchen, including the coffee maker as old as their marriage. That coffee pot symbolized to me everything a good… Continue reading He stood at the gallows and had the last laugh
When words fail, liturgy speaks
I've lost loved ones from suicide and cancer. I've written a book about living with unresolved pain and suffering. And yet, I think I'm more of an "expert" (I use the term loosely) on what not to say to hurting people rather than what to say. It's a lot easier to be dismissive or insensitive… Continue reading When words fail, liturgy speaks